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We are in our 40s and want children, but my partner cannot ejaculate during sex

We are very much in love and the pressure is on to have a family, but my partner hasn’t been able to orgasm with me since I had a miscarriage

My partner and I are very much in love and are very solid in our relationship. We are both in our 40s and 100% sure we are right for each other. However, he is unable to ejaculate at all through sex. We are trying to have a family and so the pressure is on to perform. He was fine until I had a miscarriage. He is up for going to see someone to talk about it, but I can’t imagine what help that would be.

For your partner, there is nothing sexually exciting about a demand for his semen to appear in the right place at the right time. Be grateful he is willing to talk about it, and follow up as soon as possible by encouraging him to seek therapeutic work. This is particularly important since his inability to ejaculate during penetration may be linked to a fear of you having another miscarriage. Quite unconsciously, a man’s body will sometimes take on this kind of protective mode.

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